Say No To The Hermit Lyf….and drugs lol

Lol is right Disco Tramp.

Those who do not wander are lost…

Alright, alright, alright, let’s get down to it then.

How To Get 2 & From San Francisco

  • Buy a breathalyzer from Best Buy! This handy gadget will remove the, “I think I feel ok to drive”, assumption. Either you can legally drive or not, but this little baby has got me out of a lot of trouble and stress. If you are over the limit, wait 30 minutes, eat water and drink some food, then repeat:)
  • Find a Schabert (aka non drinker) and/or stoner who would prefer to not partake and let them drive. This is by far the best way to have an awesome night and save some $$$.
  • Catch da Fairy — Yes we get it, you’re on a boat (uh suh Andy Samberg). This is by far the classiest way to get 2 NOT FROM the city. It has a bar and you get some spectacular views of the shitty. However, it does stop running early (last trip leaves SF at 9pm’ish) so you may need to have an all nighter with some babe you found #indaclub (I miss Usher) OR share an Uber home — catch an XL full of friends, and not in the 2x surcharge time, and it should cost less than $10 each to get back to San Raffy…you welcome
  • Try Oakland — I have never been at night time coz I hear that’s how murder be reign’N forealz. But in all seriousness, let me know how it is….

OMG I am so thirsty for a comment…. Please, please, please comment else i’ll have to punish my bad self xoxo

I love you,

Disco Tramp


Stoners Guide To Being Stoned

Someone please pinch me! Marijuana is legalized in California?!?! Yesir, Prop 64 passed baby! Every stoner’s dream, being able to walk into a store pick up some essentials and also grab an eighth for the road. Excellent! Everyone is going to be a part of the Litty Committee.

Here is a quick guide to getting stoned

  • Find a plug; not the one you stick forks in but like Scarface minus the blow…maybe a little blow. But find a plug!!!!
  • Pair up! Groups of two are perfect for splitting the price plus gives you a smoking buddy to “rip bowls of that green no lucky charms.”
  • OMG! This Top Ramen is phenomenal. But have snacks ready at all cost.. Or a destination for the snacks because munchies are real and it is an experience that never gets old.
  • Nature Feels, being lit at the top of Mt. Tam on a clear day — guarantee you’ll nut yourself. But really get outside and light up a joint.
  • Gatorade.. H20.. GATORADE! H20!!! Keep a thirst quencher nearby to limit the dry throat.

Comment on this blog with your funniest stoner moments because it’s fun to laugh at yourself every now and then. Don’t be a comment, leave a lame.

I love you,

Disco Tramp

Make Dominican Great Again

Welcome back to Velvet Rope Blog!!! Your presence is making me all hot and bothered in the pants. I know, a lot of you are thinking, Dominican was never great. And you’d be right… until now. Let’s try for something a little more realistic, shall we?

I wonder what normal people think about?

Some of the top party college’s in Mericah, San Diego State (#42), Santa Barbara (#20), Arizona (#57), Tulane University (#1). Ok, so all of those ‘I’m shmacked’ school are out of our league. What we need is a slightly more artsy fartsy feel.

Tips on How… To Fill The Social Calendar
  • Hop on the fancy train and educate yourself about VINO. Napa is right around the corner — and YOU should be walking sideways, with a bottle of Rosé in your pouch.
  • Get your ass to San Francisco! Seriously people, it is one of the best city’s in the world, and it is less than 30 minutes drive. Underage or not, there is always something fun going on there. Plus you may actually just meet some other people, and make friends — or bump ugly’s 😉
  • San Rafael isn’t too bad during the week. Trivia night at the Mayflower is decent —  actually, scratch that. You’re better off getting really high and having a slumber party.
  • Plan Early — Don’t wait until Friday to organize your weekend. This shit is serious business, your social media followers deserve better.

Comment on this blog and i’ll spread a scandalous rumor about you. Y’all know how fast they spread at DU. As always…

I love you,

Disco Tramp

Why Dominican University’s Social Scene Sucks

Dominican University has 1,363 undergraduate students (thanks Wiki). So let’s just say that 50% of the student body is lame AF, minus a few others, carry the one…..Annndd we’re left with 600 strong. 600 raging degenerates that want nothing more than to lose a few brain cells, and maybe bump ugly’s with a stranger. So why is it so damn fetch here? — Mean Girls reference (well played Disco Tramp)

Enough With The Math Nerdbutt

Maybe it’s living in this wealthy area, where old people enjoy calling the five-0, shutting down every decent house party to ever exist – – thinking of you, volleyball girls of 2015.

OR when some brave soul says, “fuck it!”, and volunteers their house as tribute, which is promptly met by a mob of impressively drunk, overly eager students, all squeezing in a small house to create a human sauna – – #feelthebern.

Unfortunately, we’ve all been here…the failed attempts at turning the music off…the host politely telling everybody to, “shut the fuck up….please”, goes unnoticed. The walls start to sweat from the cesspit of bodies that are getting ‘Lit AF’, and somehow, Woody is naked…again.

Agghaha yes! All of this is shamefully true. But there is something to be done.

Tips On How…To Not Suck As Much
  • Day Drinking – Follow Michael Manfredi’s footsteps with Labor Dayge and start throwing more day parties?! – – less likely to get broken up + beers are colder duh
  • Become the craziest DII sports fans of all time…Lots of sport = lots of pre gaming #SkooooPengs
  • Don’t be that girl, respect other people, and their house. You don’t have to be throwing up while someone draws a penis on your head to be having fun…

I love you,

Disco Tramp